Evolving.

Last week I met with the local Licensed Acupuncturist, E. He has lots of experience in helping women correct hormonal imbalances; and he has successfully helped numerous patients not only become pregnant, but also have healthy pregnancies resulting in healthy babies. I took him my portfolio of charted cycles and he was very impressed with my attention to detail, as well as optimistic that he can help me. We got started right away!

First, E conducted a Chinese medicine exam on me. This involved taking an electric probe and touching each of my finger tips and toes with it to measure the flow of energy in my body. The probe is connected to software on a computer that produced a colored bar graph. The graph was equipped with a 'baseline range' in the middle-- the first 10 bars were above the baseline range, and the second set of 10 bars were below-- with a few bars here and there right on target. E explained to me that this graph tells him that my body is holding most of its energy in the upper portion, whereas there should be a balance with all (or most!) of the bars hovering around the baseline range. He pushed a button on his keyboard which shifted the graph to an X and Y Axis tool, showing a '+' in the second quadrant (upper right side). Over the X and Y axis, the outline of a human body was transposed, meaning that the '+' sign fell about 'heart level'... how symbolic. E explained that the image should be taken as literal as it appears, but I can't help but feel on-board with the literal symbolism. Next, E asked me to stick out my tongue and noted that my tongue lacks the normal volume of 'coating', and also, the sides of my tongue are indented with teeth marks leading him to question why my tongue is swollen? We talked for about 45 minutes, getting to know each other. I learned he has a minor in psychology, so I'm sure he learned a lot more about me than I did about him. I had to complete about 6 pages of paperwork detailing my fertility history, and I also had to sign a 'Consent for Treatment'-- then we were on our way!

After our initial consultation and exam, I was anxious to get started and luckily, E didn't have any patients scheduled until later so we could move forward with our first acupuncture session.

I had no idea what to expect. E directed me to lay down on this  heated table. I had to roll up both of my pant legs. I watched E gather several sterile needles, and with much confidence, he proceeded to put a needle in each of my ankle- first feeling for the most tender tendon. I also got needles in the outsides of each of my knees, and one of the insides of each of my palms near my thumbs. All of this while talking to be about teaching myself to turn off my mind. That is going to be the hard part! After the needles were placed, he turned out the lights in the room, there was some soft earth-like sounds playing in the background, and he left the room for about 20 minutes while I 'cooked'. The heated table was very relaxing. I didn't feel the needles at all. But I couldn't find a quiet place in my mind. Like I said, it's gonna be hard.

Yesterday I completed the second session of acupuncture therapy. I arrived pretty anxious-- my cycle this month is abnormal, I can't pinpoint ovulation (if it even happened), there isn't a thermal shift yet, and I'm on cycle day 24. Since my mc, an 'enhanced' sign that my period is coming is having increased anxiety level during PMS. I notice that I OBSESS about never having another baby or when (IF!!) my cycles will be normal again. I had these feeling yesterday, so I'm thinking my period will start soon. I explained all of this to E and he restated that stress management is going to be a key component for me in acupuncture therapy. So yesterday, he stuck me with twice as many needles, including one between my eyes! But listen, for the first time ever, I feel like I found a quiet place in my mind! While laying on the heated table all needled up, I visualized all of my stress and anxiety forced to leave my body through each of the tiny pinholes. At one point, I even felt 'out of body'... I could feel my body, but I couldn't feel the configuration of my body. I couldn't feel my individual fingers, or even the direction my feet rested. Could I have possibly achieved a 'meditative state'?! Winning! EVOLVING!